Every family or couple can be charted in terms of Flexibility and Cohesion.  Cohesion is a feeling of emotional closeness.  Flexibility is the amount of change that happens in leadership, roles and rules.  Healthy families are typically balanced between flexibility and cohesion. In the following chart, green means balanced. Orange means that one area is out of balance. Red means both flexibility and cohesion are out of balance.

Rigid, Disengaged Rigid, Connected Rigid, Cohesive Rigid, Enmeshed
Structured, Disengaged Structured, Connected Structured, Cohesive Structured, Enmeshed
Flexible, Disengaged Flexible, Connected Flexible, Cohesive Flexible, Enmeshed
Chaotic, Disengaged Chaotic, Connected Chaotic, Cohesive Chaotic, Enmeshed

Where do you think that your family lies?  Later on, I will post a quiz detailing where your family lies on this chart.